KAITLIN SCHLUTER | arts & culture editor
Getting from campus to campus can take some time but is bound to happen at least once a semester.
Getting to west campus isn’t always the easiest: the trolley is late, you get stuck walking behind a tour group or the trolley driver won’t let another person on.
Sweat no more with these tips on how to get to west campus in 10 minutes.
1. The obvious answer would be to arrive early, but seeing that you are already late, perfect your speed walk. This method is best performed by a fast swaying of hips and close arm movements. For better traction wear sneakers (exclude Chuck Taylors and Rainbows).
2. As soon as you see the trolley come into view, don’t take a moment to hesitate. Proceed to immediately place yourself in front of the line, using arms, legs and other necessary objects to spread out a region of domain. Refraining from a morning shower may also contribute to your placement in line. Who has time to lather anyway?
3. Forget the trolley and run straight to the cafeteria, grabbing an assortment of bananas and apples to compose a fruit basket to provide as a guilt offering for your lack of responsibility. Other productive means include guilt offerings in the form of money, exaggerated compliments and a Naked Juice.
4. Make use of alternative transportation; not all can master tip number one. Bicycles built for one or two allow you to cruise pass pedestrians on the sidewalk. If biking isn’t your style, refer to the favored longboard. If you don’t have a longboard, nonchalantly grab a board off the wall on your way out of class; usually a variety of three or four are available. If a longboard isn’t in the classroom, grab a scooter or the student next to you. Piggy back rides are another efficient means.
Use these tips and you’ll be on west before you can say “God first.” Have a happy ten minutes.
